Chimes in children's voices

It's Sunday, and I usually take the dog for a walk in the evening and sit in the playground for a while, usually an hour before sunset.  In the past months I have noticed, there are more young children, and from a number of nationalities. It's like a junior UN.

I enjoy this moment when I have it.

It's quite something to watch them interact. They may be strangers initially for about three minutes, but soon they are bosom buddies, screaming, yelling playing catch or hide and seek and chasing each other all over the park. They play together, falling in so easily,  no matter the age difference or skin colour or their accents; the more the merrier. Unspoken rules yet they understand the child's world of play.

As I sit there listening, I find myself undisturbed and sooth; there is a sweetness in the voices, a freedom, ..not a care.I'm lulled into this nether world of innocence for a little while as I rest on a park bench amid plants and trees, lulled by voices like gentle chimes.

I wonder, is this  an example of what Ericc Fromm tried to describe as the 'Shabbat institution' ( a Sunday rest).."rest in the sense of the re-establishment of complete harmony between human beings and between them and nature."

Managing tension? Add Faith...

‘Hypertension’ the moment the doctor mentioned that my BP was approaching that level it has kept me thinking.  Am I in a state of distress ?. Am I putting myself there?. I have always considered myself calm and patient and yet perhaps it’s being eroded by all the negative things going on in my life for the past year. I just realized it has been a year, since the actual proceedings began.

I’ve moved from acceptance to elation to worry.

Acceptance because I can finally get on with living and not the hollow shell I have been for so long, acceptance because this is where my prayers have led me and this must be the step, the only solution which I am grateful has been taken out of my hands.

Elation because of the liberation from the abusive environment and the hell of my ex’s ill-foreboding ever-presence. Worry over the mischief the ex is

Life - like a carnival

Stepping into colours and sights,
sounds, smells, noise and wild movement.

Exhilaration and excitement unfurls, 

where to begin, what to try, which to sample.

Slowly the atmosphere soaks in, we warm up,
the game stalls beckon,

look at those soft toys, a sigh, not easy,  we move on.

Check out the carousel, how many rides,

just get on, let's not get off at all,

round and round,  easy and breezy, 

round and round, up and down,

Are we free, feels whimsical, 

can we toss the worries,

can I stay forever on my white horse.

Cotton candy puffs and popcorn smells, let’s get some.

We’re done,  it’s time to get the heart pumping.

Do we ride the roller coaster or the magic carpet?

Upside down or a real fast drop, what a choice, both or one.

We scream at the top of our lungs, breathing hard,

gripping the sides, knuckles straining out.

One more time, now with eyes open

we do it again, the speed demon takes over.

More exhilarated, eyes bright, minds giddy,

we rush on to the magic carpet.

Heart and stomach lost in transit, shot straight down, 

we come out and down, happily dazed.

Looking up, there looms ahead a glittering Ferris wheel.

Slowly and steadily, it seems to call. 

Let’s get to the top of the world. 

Will we ever get there? 

Another round, another shot at the top.

Slow and steady, in and out, we breathe in the clear air,
as we make our way.

Finally,  we are back down to earth, 

and it’s time to take leave.

Goodnight to lights, noise, smells and sights.

We're done now,
childhood, to youth, to grey.

(HA-8/11)

250th Post

250 posts and crawling.. ... I celebrated 150 posts in October last year, somewhere along the way I hit 200 and didn't celebrate.

I'm still writing, and I am glad. It's been a trouble-filled first half of year for me and a trying one for the kids. My hobby time is seriously compromised and I'm aching to get back to it. But the kids and this drama are taking a toll.

Writing helps, taking my mind off and into other modes of thoughts helps to keep some form of balance ...to be objective and think about what is important. I have been going back over some of what I have written and there are many reminders and lessons that show that time heals different wounds.
In many of them, I  seem to be talking to me!

I think a good posting average would be 1 a week, if I can keep up that is. I started in June 2009, so I think I'm doing OK.

http://mothersalways.blogspot.com/2010/03/stand-tall.html

Divorce Coach | A Narcissist Will Not Cease and Desist!

I came across this blog through's Mandy's blog sincemydivorce.com.. and there's a picture close to my reality..I did marry a narcissist..This is what stresses me out, will he desist?

Divorce Coach | A Narcissist Will Not Cease and Desist!

That time of the month...

This is a post that only women CAN understand.  I haven't hit 50 yet,  I keep thinking that instead of getting better during THAT time of the month, it feels worse. .. hormones !!!!
Today this is how I feel, my body feels like it has aged 20years or more and my eyes feel like my brain is squishing down on it and my joints feel stiff and sore (like I'm 90 though I have no idea how a 70 year old feels either).  It's like overnight,  someone took my body and replaced it with some old cranked up worn down body.  That SUMS IT UP.

But thankfully usually and HOPEFULLY, it's over within a couple of days, but it's horrible when you can't take off and you have to sit in the office and work and smile like everything is normal, FINE and DANDY.

The primrose isn't helping.!

Fresh

 

I stepped out this morning

the earth smelt fresh, washed,

very little was stirring

even the sun seemed abashed,

hidden behind veils of white,

not a human sound

nor one in sight.

Then, further down the road,

an engine, a gnawing drone

dogs awaken in their abode

I am no longer alone.

The newspaper arrives,

hear the barks come alive.

What news brings the day

houses rouse, raps and thuds,

a cool breeze whispers, leaves sway,

alone, me and my thoughts.

(HA 08/11)