I suppose this is the cycle of life, the drama of life and so on BUT Life goes on.
I wrote about My Mother sometime ago. Recently I have been dredging up old memories, which I know I should just drop. My mother has been acting out (literally acting petulant) because of grief and loss and getting me worked up.
A close relative passed away and bad family history (little dramas and sagas) gets dug up. Grief performs some amazing tricks with the mind.
How does a younger person offer advise to an elderly on forgiveness and letting go and moving forward ?
Not that I ever believed I had a perfect family, history and all, I just never heard much about it. At the same time I am hearing about lots of new historical drama that has passed within my own and the different extended families. Arranged marriages that were forced to work and typical IN-LAW horror stories (not a myth !!)... this is the gist of history of my past generation.
My history ( if it be told by my children) ironically while imperfect too is made up of none of these.
Yeah BM it depends what one considers a perfect family to be.
ReplyDeleteFew days while i was recuperating from my knee injury i was forced to be a couch potato and i watched these tv soaps at a stretch. ' Modern Family' being one such. Now in India such a family is still a taboo where children swear, there are unconventional relationships...
But what i liked about the tv comedy drama is that the family members are honest about their feelings and sincere in understanding their faults and foibles. That is one thing i value tremendously. Honesty and sincerity. And whether the family spends quality time together or not comes secondary. With families now no longer compact and scattered here and there i guess a perfect family would be where these two qualities co-exist along with the respectable space given to all the members to do their own thing.
i wish i could tell my Octogenarian Dad that but i can't because of late he has become obnoxiously self righteous and besides it's too late to ask him to change so i keep trying hard not to get annoyed or irritable...although sometimes i succumb. Sometimes i wish though he gave me some space and respected me too for my own lessons learnt through experiences of my own instead of harping about his own... all the time.
Sigh!...now i ask the same...who has a perfect family...?
My family is not perfect, but we tolerate and try to understand each other.
ReplyDeleteWe argue, we disagree, but we care n love . That is what is important.
I hope Sage realises and understands that! Hiaz
God bless