A question of fairness

Is it normal to constantly think in terms of balance of problems ?  I know that others do not have perfect lives but some just seem to have less troubles than I do. Then I think that's unfair. Why me ?

My life has improved much, and it is ridiculous to expect it to be perfect BUT from time to time (when I am tried) I wallow, I compare myself, my life with that of others and I always feel like I have more to weather than others.

I think in terms of no kids vs 3 kids vs 1 kid vs parents with smart kids vs kids who have to work so hard vs the busy parent vs SAHM vs the single (happy go lucky), the well traveled vs luck vs luckless..  etc etc etc..


There' s a saying that God doesn't give us more than we can handle, but why do we have to have more than others at all. Isn't some enough ? Why do some seem to have none at all ?

I read somewhere too, that we experience problems because God wants to see or test our reactions to it rather than the solution of it.  So does it add to our credit line somewhere or reduce our debt on some conscience balance sheet for a place in heaven ?
It seems that we all don't begin with the same starting balance.

The mulling lasts a little while and then I thank God because there is more goodness to be grateful for than what went before. We all have different strengths to handle life differently, I suppose that is why.

There's a reason for all things that happen to us, I believe that strongly and yet ..........





 

Teenage angst

How long does this phase last ?  The rule books are out on this.

My youngest is entering the teen phase soon, although I think he's there already...

My oldest is out of the teen zone but still very much in the phase of hormones... or it could a girl thing.

I honestly cannot recall going through this phase with that much upheaval where my parents were concerned. I think it was within me, betweee me and myself and among school mates mostly but it wasn't too rocky a period, quite uneventful I think... or did I have it too much under control. Hmmm ???

The good thing is, they are talking to me; I won't always call it a conversation all the time, it could be one way (either way) too.

They get angry, so do I (I am allowed aren't I...I think the rule books says so ) but I keep it going when they think it's the end of the world, like there was no explosion,  and sometimes I behave like there was no battle and they can be baffled by this but I think they are getting used to the idea.  There are moments when they weigh it by, that the battle between us was stronger just by the length of my silence.

I will survive !


                                 

Self pity

Self pity...it's easy to fall into this hole,

they are fairly common along the road

we walk every day.

It comes from holding on to the past.

Let go.

Unfortunately those around us 

don't always let us forget

and moments, words in exchange

force us to remember bitter thoughts.

and then we fall.