A doggie to boost life.

.....  something happy to post about !
I got us a dog a few months ago. A spaniel, a cute little girlie looking(becos she looks like a she) dog of 4 years, with long floppy furry ears. They are supposed to be of a 'barkie' nature, but she seems to control herself.

At the onset of the drama, when we were officially divorced, I thought a dog would do several different things for us, the kids and me. We got her from the SPCA(the pound), unbelievable that someone could just give up a dog after 3 1/2 years.

A pet is a dependent and so the kids especially the boys feel a sense of responsibility and take to caring for her in their own ways. They relate differently to the dog as well.  They share certain responsibilities like taking her for her walks and ensuring she gets fed when big sister or mummy is not around.
She's drawn our hugs and attention and love just by being, and literally brought light into some of the shadow that we carry around with us.. 

For the youngest, he's her playmate as much as she is his. But doggie is a little wary of children I observed. But she is good-natured in the way she continues to let him annoy her, almost tolerant-like in the way her eyes follow him.
She's jealous and protective(from other-dog perspective) and super friendly with all humans. She's also a little beggar at the dining table, like we don't feed her enough.  Truly those big puppy dog eyes just melts your resolve.

With my middle kid, some of his maturity comes out, and his temperament is pretty much calmer around the little fella. 

The primary care giver is my oldest, she's just into animals, birds and even insects. She is her best pal, she's her silent companion. She sneaks in to sleep near her whenever she can.

Doggie's got the patience to just listen quietly and she looks at you paying real close attention. You know she'll keep your secrets. She's constantly butting against my legs, warm and sort of comforting really to just sit with her. And sometimes she can be like another mischievous kid when she gets into the mood to keep  yapping at the wind.

This little dog does wonders for us, does she know, I think she does cos she keeps begging for more treats.

Putting out fires

Sometimes I want to just shy away from the fight, to leave things be (hope for the best) and wish somebody else will fight my problems for me.  I have never been good at confrontations, perhaps a consequence of my strange marriage experience which keeps me running back to the corner now and then, (thank God it happens less frequently).

The ex  now appears to be drawing the kids' teachers into his battle plan. But not all of them, he picks the weaker child or the weaker subject and uses that to his advantage. He had gone to see a none-too favourite teacher of my youngest boy and since then, my son had been behaving antsy, in fits and starts I would hear strange statements made by this teacher through my son. And my first thought was 'no way, the  ex is not going to use a teacher to continue his bullying for him, and if this teacher is dumb enough to be influenced on heresay, then he deserves to be reported'. Then I thought about it and decided I would not jump the gun, I would go corner him and find out exactly his view of the situation, to see how his inclinations swayed.

I hate confrontations, eventhough this was not quite that, but it had to be done for my son's sake. After all, teachers have been instructed specifically to stay clear of family issues and ensure the child's well-being.
I gave him a surface 'lay of the land' and expressed my concerns as to the changes (negative) in my son's behaviour, considering that all seemed to be as well as could be in the past (same teacher for this subject) until recently (when my ex began to involve himself in the children's school and their study). The teacher went on about his methods and his wishes for the students and so on. I told him that was all good and fine until he used the word discipline. 'Discipline' is my ex's favourite excuse for his past abuse of the children. And when that word came up, I looked him in the eyes and said that sure it is important, but a child must also want to do it (persuaded to do so for the right reasons).

I did not wish to give him the full background just enough for him to understand, that the child dwells currently in a hostile environment,  that he(teacher) needed to watch where he tread, as there was a lot more than just a divorce affecting the child and I did not want my son retreating backwards dreading old experiences (before the protection order was applied).

The teacher must have gotten the idea, as he hastily seemed to assure me that he would certainly not touch on family situations but ensure the child's well-being where school matters are concerned, taking into account my concerns.